Say what you mean and mean what you say!! Truely follow your dreams!

"We have to stay away from Alyssa because, well she doesn't like you."
-Shad

Sometimes I admire my six year old brothers honesty. He really isn't afraid to say what he means, even if it might not be completely acceptable. A lot of the time as we get older we stop saying what we feel, and try to put things in a way other people won't judge. We stop saying that we want to the president, or princesses, cowboys, or mermaids. We stop because we are scared to hear we can't do it, that we need to be something more realistic. But honestly I wish I still had that little kid mentally! I wish I always said what I meant and meant what I said. I wish I had never backed down from what I really wanted.

When we don't mean what we say and don't say what we mean, it just makes life so much more confusing. When we say we want something that we really don't. I have said stuff, and thought to myself I did not mean that, why did I say that, that is not something I want. Life could be so simple if we could just be honest. But I guess there are those times that you really don't even know what you mean. When you forget what you really want. This is because of the craziness and chaotic nature of our lives and the people in them. When we forget what is really important. We focus on the useless aspects of life and fill or heads with mindless chatter. It happens to everyone. It seems like the more I learn the more confused I get. I am always being bombarded with facts I'm never going to have to use or would ever want to use. But it still takes up space, and once you hear something you do have it forever.

I remember just wanting to grow up when I was little, but now I feel like I need more time as a kid.  Funny how that happens. When you want something, it doesn't come fast enough. When you are dreading something, it comes before you know it. Now all I really want is that simplicity back. When you could focus on one thing, and one thing only. Now, it's a constant parade of thoughts when you are trying to concentrate. The constant chatter of worries and questions. Questions that you wish could be a simple yes or no question. Now it's not that easy. It's not cheerios or frosted flakes, it's things that are really going to affect you and your future. It's not as easy when it's going to affect the rest of your life.  I remember thinking as a little girl that I knew all the answers. When I just knew that I was Barbie and My Ken would come and say Hey babe wanna go for a ride. And I would jump into his convertible, we'd get married and live happily ever after in Barbie and Kens dream house. Now the reality is hitting me. Things are that easy. I have to really work for what I want to accomplish.

As much as I wish that my Ken will come before any of the worldly worries hit me, it's not going to happen. I have to make all the choices about my future. And my choices will have consequences good or bad. Things aren't going to be as easy as I had always thought.It's not as simple as Yes or No, This or That. You have all the questions that come to your mind to answer, all the what if's. I have come to realize all this with just trying to choose a college. There is the influence of other people's opinions, and of the the what if I don't like it. What if I change my mind. What if, What if, What if. there are endless what if's. And it seems like endless confusion. Do I do what I want, and makes me happy, or do I listen to what my parents want, and let them decide my future. Every decision leaves something to chance, and we won't know the outcome until it happens.

I say take a little risk. Do what you want! Jump as high as you can and reach for Neptune! If you fall and miss your landing, get right back up and try again. Follow your dreams! I know I will! I'm going to be just as successful as Barbie. I'll find my Ken and live happily ever after in our dream house. I might have been a little kid saying that, But as I have learned back then I said what I meant, and meant what I said! I meant That! i might at time fall, and have that confusion and not know what to choose. I will make mistakes, but they will make me better and I will learn from them. It will seem hard and confusing and anything but simple. But I can do it. i can try my best to bring that little kid mentality back and stick to my decisions. Mean exactly what I say and don't second guess myself. I won't have that simplicity of knowing ALL the answers. But I will do my best to try.  But I have faith in myself that I will follow the best path for me! That I will find the little kid in me and be Barbie.

So Just Love Me, and remember say what you mean and follow your dreams.
Alyssa